Disillusioned With Christianity? Atheism Isn’t Your Only Option If You Want to Leave

Agnes Kantaruk/Shutterstock.com

Several years ago, I went through a spiritual crisis that led me to become disillusioned with Christianity. But as I began questioning and examining my Christian beliefs, my intention wasn’t to leave religion. I just wanted to feel more at peace with myself and my relationship with God.

Even so, as I began learning things on my deconstruction journey, I finally arrived at the conclusion that there’s no need for me to practice any particular religion at all. Now I consider myself spiritual, not religious. (For the record, I prefer to think of “deconstruction” in this context as belief and value clarification.)

The thing is, sometimes when people leave Christianity, they may feel like they need to walk away from their Higher Power, too. Considering how central belief in a Higher Power is to Christianity, this is understandable.

But this may lead some to think that their only option after leaving is to become an atheist or something like that, an idea that some Christians may find unappealing. But I feel that this is based on too simplistic a view of that which is greater than us. And as I discuss in this post, you can leave Christianity without walking away from your Higher Power.

The Atheist Misidentification

If people choose to use the atheist label for themselves, they’re free to do so. But based on my understanding of spirituality and that which is greater than us, I believe a lot of people actually misidentify as atheists.

To me, spirituality is simply a sense of being connected to something greater. We can feel this in anything that causes us to be deeply moved, like when listening to beautiful music. We can also feel this when spending time with loved ones or enjoying pleasures like good food or when just being wonderfully lost in doing something that makes us forget time is passing while we do it, sometimes referred to as “the flow state.”

I consider all of these ways of experiencing the Divine. And I believe we all have these experiences. That’s why I don’t know if anyone can really be classified as an atheist.

From what I understand, an atheist is someone who doesn’t believe in the conventional Western understanding of God. That understanding is that God is an invisible Being “out there,” and a masculine one at that. I used to believe in this kind of God, but my beliefs about my Higher Power have changed as I’ve gone on my deconstruction journey.

How I See My Higher Power and Spirituality Now

Now I see my Higher Power as spirit, not as a Being. When I reflect on the vastness of the universe and the incredible order of it all, I have to believe that there is something greater than us. And I’ve also had personal experiences of that Power. But the conventional Western understanding of God isn’t enough to describe it. That’s why I like to use so many different names for it, including “the universe.”

When it comes to how I see myself, I prefer to call myself spiritual, not religious. I’m no longer a Christian but the label “atheist” doesn’t suit me because I do believe in a Higher Power. I just understand that Force differently than I did when I was still a Christian.

I also don’t believe you have to perform any particular rituals or do any specific practices to consider yourself spiritual. If you want to incorporate them into your routine because you find they add value to your life, that’s fine. But I think that just noticing those moments when you feel connected to something greater is enough to consider yourself spiritual.

And if you do notice those moments and choose not to consider yourself spiritual, that’s fine, too. You’re free to use whatever label or labels you prefer. At the end of the day, the labels you use for yourself don’t really matter. All that matters is whether you feel like you’re living life to the full. In my opinion, that’s the essence of living a spiritual life.

Doing what makes you happy. Having a sense of purpose. Surrounding yourself with people who bring you joy. Or just enjoying time alone with nature or a good book. According to my definition of spirituality, these are all ways of connecting to the Divine.

And so, from my perspective, anyone who finds that they’re living a happy or fulfilling life can’t be classified as an atheist. That’s also true for anyone who experiences any form of love or who strives to share love. Love is another way of experiencing or connecting to that which is greater than us.

What This Means for Disillusioned Christians

Again, people are free to use the labels they prefer to describe themselves. But to any Christians who are disillusioned with Christianity, I would like to let you know that if you’re considering leaving religion, you don’t automatically have to become an atheist or an agnostic or anything like that if those labels don’t suit you. There is another path.

You can still be spiritual without religion. And you can continue to believe in a Higher Power. But part of your deconstruction journey might involve learning to view your Higher Power differently, which is what happened for me. And I find it freeing to see that Force in a new way.

This has not only helped to ease my religious scrupulosity, but it has allowed me to practice a form of spirituality that feels authentic to me. I think that’s one of the best parts about leaving religion. You no longer have to believe things or perform rituals based on other people’s experiences of their Higher Power. You get to practice your own spirituality based on your own experiences of that Power.

Final Thoughts

If you’ve become disillusioned with Christianity or religion in general, please know that atheism isn’t your only other option if it’s not an appealing one to you. Instead, you can choose a version of spirituality that feels authentic to you because it’s based on your own experiences of your Higher Power.

It’s not about believing certain things or performing certain rituals. It’s about filling your days with things that make you happy and allow you to feel connected to something greater. This is the essence of authentic spirituality. And I personally think it’s something everyone would do well to practice in some form.

~ Ashley C.

P.S. If you’re a Christian who would like help deconstructing your religious beliefs and developing this kind of authentic spirituality, I offer spiritual coaching services you might be interested in. Simply click here to learn more.