Why Do INFJs Make Great Partners For People Who Have Been Hurt in Love?
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Anyone who has ever been hurt needs to be healed. This is no less true for emotional pain than it is for physical pain. If someone has been hurt in love, whether once or many times, that person should try to begin the healing process before entering a new relationship.
The thing is, once the healing has begun, that person may be afraid to enter a new relationship because they don’t want to get hurt again. Either they don’t want to stop the progress that has been made or they don’t feel comfortable opening their fragile and newly-healed heart to anyone new. This is perfectly understandable.
But if that person ever wants to have a romantic relationship, they will need to find the courage to trust someone with their heart again.
If you’re someone who’s been hurt in love but who’s ready to try a new relationship, here are five reasons why an INFJ would be a great partner for you.
5 Reasons INFJs Make Great Partners for People Who Have Been Hurt in Love
INFJs are healers.
INFJs are born healers. We’re predisposed to want to help people become whole and live their best lives. If we sense that there’s any emotional pain you’re going through, we will be especially sensitive to that and do whatever we can to ensure you recover completely.
We won’t toy with your emotions. We won’t vanish for no reason. And we will respond to all your texts, emails, and calls—though you might not want to call too often if your INFJ doesn’t like talking on the phone. (But even if they don’t like it, they will still take your calls.)
Simply put, we will do our best to create the kind of environment necessary for healing and strengthening to take place. We’ll be there for you, reassuring you that some people can be trusted with even a heart as fragile as yours. And as our relationship develops, you’ll find the healing you crave—and so much more.INFJs tend to put others’ needs before theirs.
INFJs’ strong empathy means that we are constantly paying attention to the needs of those around us. If you’re in a relationship with an INFJ, you can be sure you’ll always have someone ready to listen after you’ve had a long day, ready to hold you when you cry, and ready to show you affection when you need it the most.
We may even surprise you by anticipating your needs. If we notice you’ve been down lately, we may do something to cheer you up. If we know you’re staying late at work one day, we may come by to bring you dinner. If we feel your desire for more intimacy, we may offer it to you.
This is not to say that you never have to make your needs known to an INFJ. We’re not mind-readers. And in any healthy relationship, both partners should feel comfortable and make a habit of voicing their needs.
All I’m saying is, because your INFJ will be especially attuned to your mood, emotions, and feelings, your needs will be cared for. (Just make sure your INFJ also takes care of their own needs.)INFJs love deeply.
We INFJs are known for our intense love. It’s hard for us to love any other way. When we love, we go all in. That’s our nature. And unless we’ve also been hurt in love or have some other reason to hold back our emotions, we will love you completely and unconditionally from the start.
Anyone who has been hurt in love would benefit from being loved completely by someone. Not everyone has this ability and even those who do don’t always know how to tap into it right away.
Look at it this way. If you’re thirsty, are you going to drink from a trickle of water or from a pool? We INFJs are deep pools of water for people who are thirsty for love—real love. You won’t get shallow or superficial love from us. Once we open our heart to you, you’ll get only the deepest love humans have to offer—the kind of love that heals.INFJs prefer long-term, committed relationships.
Most INFJs don’t like dating just to date. We’re searching for our life partner or soulmate. That means you won’t usually find us entering shallow relationships.
While you may think a shallow relationship is better for you while your heart heals, I think it’s best to trust your heart to someone you know is here to stay.
As INFJs, if we tell you we’re with you, we’re with you. You don’t have to worry that we’ll get bored with you or move on to someone else after a short time. Unless an INFJ is dealing with emotional problems of their own, they will be committed to their romantic relationships. So, you can trust that your heart is in safe hands.INFJs cherish their partner.
If an INFJ is in love with you, there will be no other person above you in their life. They’ll be constantly thinking about you. They’ll be thinking of creative ways to keep your love on fire. They’ll yearn to shower you with affection whenever they can. They’ll want to be with you wherever you are.
As introverts, INFJs will need their alone time. But when they’re with you, you will feel their love. Even if you’re alone together doing separate activities, you’ll still feel their love. You’ll feel its strength, warmth, and constancy.
This is the kind of love you want to feel if your heart is still healing or has just healed from hurt. While you could potentially get this kind of love from someone of any personality type, loving this way is natural for INFJs.
Final Thoughts
If someone were to ask me how they can avoid getting hurt in love again, aside from staying single, I would advise them to date an INFJ. While INFJs are flawed like every other human being, we do know how to love.
Also, I mentioned above that, if you have been hurt in love, it’s best to try to begin the healing process before entering a new relationship. But I’m also aware that sometimes being loved by the right person can be just the catalyst you need to start healing. It’s all about feeling ready. If you feel ready to start a new relationship, then go ahead.
Now I turn it to you. Why do you think INFJs make great partners for people who have been hurt in love?
~ Ashley C.
Last updated: August 23, 2023