How Religion Taught Me to Take a Passive Approach to Life
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I think everyone interprets religious teachings differently, depending on who they are, what they’ve been taught, and how they’ve been taught. And some people take those teachings more literally than others.
In my case, not only did I learn to take religious teachings literally. I then invented other rules that had to be followed based on what I learned. This led to the development of mental health issues over the years. And even though I now consider myself spiritual, not religious, I’m still dealing with some of the side effects of having been religious for so long.
I now understand that I have to practice my own kind of spirituality, one based on my own beliefs. And I believe everyone should practice their own version of spirituality, one that resonates with them. I don’t think people should just follow tradition without ever examining why they believe what they believe. But that’s just my opinion.
How Religion Led to a Passive Approach
Looking back, one of the things I realize is that religion taught me to take a passive approach to life. This was just my interpretation of religious teachings, though. It’s not that everyone who’s religious takes a passive approach. But that was how my brain interpreted what I was learning.
The way I understood things before, I wasn’t supposed to make big decisions about my life. I wasn’t supposed to be the one steering things. I wasn’t supposed to do things on my own. I was supposed to wait to be told what to do. I was supposed to wait for the plan to be revealed. I was supposed to wait for instructions from my Higher Power.
This meant that I wasn’t responsible for making the big decisions for my life, like what to do in terms of a career. I was just supposed to wait until that was made plain. And if it wasn’t plain—what I was supposed to do—I couldn’t do anything about it. All I could do was wait. And maybe hope to marry a rich husband.
I no longer believe this. I believe we’re supposed to take an active role in our lives. I believe we’re all capable of doing great things. But we have to believe that before we can actually take the steps necessary to do those great things.
How This View Has Affected My Entrepreneurship Journey
One thing I’ve learned about myself is that I’m someone who doesn’t do well with other people telling me what to do. I thrive on autonomy. I like setting my own schedule. I like working at my own pace. And that means that, when it comes to things like making money, entrepreneurship is the path that’s most appealing to me.
The thing about entrepreneurship, though, is that it requires you to take an active approach—specifically, an active approach to making money. And so, it’s understandable why I’ve struggled to get a successful business started. I think one of the big roots of this struggle has been a constant sense of, “But I’m not supposed to be the one steering. I’m supposed to be waiting to be told what to do.” This mindset is not conducive to starting a successful business.
I’ve been going through this inner battle for some time. After years of waiting for the plan to be revealed and not seeing more clearly, I finally realized that I had to do something to start moving forward. But those attempts haven’t gotten me far yet.
I started becoming really religious when I entered middle school, although my family and I started attending church more regularly when I was in fifth grade. And as I began adopting new religious beliefs, I started pushing my real self aside.
This meant I was pushing aside the part of myself that was or could have been drawn to entrepreneurship earlier and the idea of being at the steering wheel of my life. It meant I was adopting beliefs that led me to think I had to wait for my Higher Power to tell me what to do, especially when it came to big stuff. And it meant I was learning to take a passive approach to life, incapable of really moving forward unless I was told what to do.
In the meantime, I did work on creating art in the form of things like poetry, songs, screenplays, and stories. This was something I very much enjoyed doing. But even when it came to sharing that art, I struggled to make money with it. I could create it and maybe share it on a small scale, but then I didn’t know what to do after.
Everything I heard about what other people did to put their art out there and make money from it seemed like such a struggle, at least that was how I viewed it. But what I was really witnessing were people who were determined to change their reality and do whatever was necessary to make that happen.
I never used to believe I was someone who could really make things happen, not when it came to areas like making money. Not even when it came to something as important as making progress in my own life. Other people could make things happen. Other people could make progress. But all I could do was wait.
Religion and Limiting Beliefs
People in the personal development space often talk about limiting beliefs. If you’ve never heard of them before, limiting beliefs are exactly what they sound like—beliefs that limit us. They limit our potential. They limit our growth. They limit our idea of what’s possible for us.
In my case, religion filled my head with a lot of limiting beliefs. And one of the biggest ones was probably the belief that I had very little control over my own life. I was mostly just a passive participant in a larger story.
I’ll admit that this belief is still something I’m working to uproot. It’s one of those side effects I’m still dealing with after staying in religion for such a long time. But I’ve seen examples of people overcome all kinds of limiting beliefs and reasons they couldn’t do things that seemed impossible for them, given their circumstances or history. They serve as inspiration for me.
And while I do still believe in there being a bigger picture, I also believe that we aren’t meant to be passive participants in it. I believe our role is meant to be active. Sometimes we have to go with the flow. But more often we have to take charge.
Final Thoughts
I believe we’re capable of overcoming any obstacle on the path to whatever it is we most desire. But first, we have to be clear on what we want. And then we have to be willing to do what’s necessary to get it.
But I’ve also learned that it’s not just about willingness. Sometimes we have to take time to examine what might be holding us back on the inside, like limiting beliefs.
Sometimes those beliefs can be very deeply rooted. And I’ve found that religion has a way of making it seem that the beliefs they’re teaching are absolute truth, which can make them especially hard to uproot. But I’ve already uprooted many religious beliefs I was taught. And I believe I can and will uproot any remaining beliefs that might be keeping me from making real progress in my own life.
And whereas before I thought my Higher Power was supposed to tell me what to do, now I believe we work together. That means I have an active role to play in moving forward.
~ Ashley C.
P.S. Making the transition from being religious to being spiritual helped me tremendously in developing this new mindset of taking an active approach to life. If you’re currently religious but would like to make the transition from being religious to being spiritual, I offer spiritual coaching services that you might be interested in. Feel free to click here to learn more.