This One Belief Can Ruin Your Efforts to Improve Your Money Mindset

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Many limiting beliefs can make it harder for people to develop a positive money mindset. If you weren’t raised in an environment where money was discussed openly and in a positive way, you likely acquired many negative beliefs about money. Or you may have inherited or developed beliefs over time that simply made it harder to believe in your ability to create financial abundance for yourself.

But even if you do some work to uproot those limiting beliefs and replace them with empowering ones, I’ve found that there is one belief that can continue to ruin your efforts to become financially savvy. And here it is:

“Someone is coming to save me.”

This is a belief that many people have because of how pervasive the idea of “being saved” or “being rescued” is in mainstream culture. We love superheroes because they always come to the rescue. In fairytales, the princess is often rescued by a prince. We glorify this concept of someone else coming to step in and make our lives better.

In my own life, the movie Annie was one of my favorites as a child. I don’t know if I ever thought this consciously, but I believe that at least unconsciously, as much as I loved my parents, I wanted to be adopted by a wealthy man. And as I grew older, the desire to be adopted by a wealthy man became the desire to marry one.

This one belief contributed significantly to my refusal to make any effort to change my financial situation for years. I just didn’t feel like I needed to. Someone was going to save me. I was going to marry a rich man. So, why should I waste my time and effort figuring out all the money stuff and developing a new money mindset?

Just looking at my own situation, I can tell you four reasons this one belief can be so destructive to developing your money mindset.

4 Reasons Believing Someone Will Save You Can Derail Your Efforts to Improve Your Money Mindset

1. It keeps you from doing the work necessary to change your financial situation.

   If you believe that someone else is coming to rescue you, you may not see a need to do anything required to change your situation for yourself. You won’t read books on how to invest wisely. You won’t take courses on wealth creation.
   
   You won’t try to find a side hustle or passive income stream that will help you reach your financial goals faster. You may not even develop any financial goals. And you won’t look for ways to be smarter with your money so you can save more, have more to invest, and pay off any debt you may have.
   
   You don’t need to do any of these things if you believe someone is coming to rescue you. And so you don’t. And your situation doesn’t change. And then you may start to wonder why. And if you take an honest look at the situation, you’ll realize it’s because you believe deep down that someone else is going to fix everything for you.

2. It prevents you from committing to changing your financial situation.

   Even if you start doing the work necessary to change your money mindset, and thus, your financial situation, having this belief in the back of your mind can keep you from fully committing to making the changes necessary to see real change.
   
   Maybe you have read some books or attended a seminar or two. But you’re not putting what you’re learning into practice. You’re not actually implementing any real changes. You’re just acquiring the knowledge but not taking the action necessary to see real change.
   
   Again, this belief in the back of your mind is keeping you from committing because you think, at least subconsciously, “I don’t really need to do any of these things because someone is coming to save me. But I’ll just keep learning to pass the time while I wait.” It’s only when you believe that it’s on you to save yourself that you’re able to fully commit to taking the actions necessary to see real change in your life.

3. It creates a sense of helplessness.

   Feeling helpless is very disempowering. It gives you the notion that you have absolutely no control over your own life. All you can do is wait for someone to come and make things better.
   
   While it’s true that there are many things in life that you can’t control, there are some things that you can control. You can control the efforts you make to change your money mindset. You can control the actions you take to change your financial situation. You can decide to feed your mind positive affirmations that reinforce the new relationship you’re trying to form with money.
   
   You can do all of these things. But if you believe someone else is coming to save you, you probably won’t. And that leaves you feeling helpless.

4. It keeps you from growing.

   If you’re trying to shift from a negative money mindset to a positive or more useful one, you’re talking about some major changes that have to happen. And that means you’re going to have to do some growing. The thing about growth is that it’s uncomfortable, which is one reason people may avoid it if they can. But as has often been said, growth only happens outside your comfort zone.
   
   You actually have to make yourself uncomfortable in order to grow. You have to learn to operate using beliefs that are new and unfamiliar to you, beliefs like, “Money is abundant,” “I have everything I need to create financial abundance for myself,” and “I’m good with money.”
   
   But if you think someone is coming to save you, you may say to yourself, “I don’t need to make myself uncomfortable. Someone else is coming to make everything better.” And so you stay in your comfort zone and refuse to take the risks or make the changes that would allow you to grow and improve your finances.

How Being a Hopeless Romantic Can Contribute to This Belief

Let me tell you, as a hopeless romantic, letting go of the notion that someone is coming to rescue me has been challenging. This belief more than many of the others I’ve had to uproot has been fighting me tooth and nail to stay in place. Even now, I have to watch myself when I see myself falling back into the mindset of, “It would be so nice if I could just marry a rich man.”

To be honest, I still think that would be nice. But if that happened, it wouldn’t allow me to go through the process of changing my own money mindset. It would allow me to continue to remain ignorant about how money and finances work.

Maybe my husband would be willing to teach me a thing or two, but I don’t think I would have any incentive to really learn these things for myself. That’s no longer acceptable for me. And if you really want to change your money mindset and grow yourself into the kind of person who can create their own financial freedom, that can’t be acceptable for you either.

How to Fix This

Because I consider myself a sensitive person, I’m not going to tell you blankly, “No one is coming to save you.” Instead, I would ask you to look at your current situation and ask yourself, “Why do I have to wait for someone to save me? Why can’t I just save myself?” When you ask these questions, you’re forced to come face-to-face with the real limiting beliefs that are holding you back. You’ll find that your mind might come back with beliefs like these:

“I’m not smart enough.”
“I don’t have the right skills.”
“I don’t have the right connections.”
“I’m not good with money.”
“I don’t have time to learn about these things.”

It’s only when you come face-to-face with what’s keeping you from changing your own situation that you actually put yourself in a position to change it. When these beliefs surface, find ways to counteract them. For example, you can replace them with empowering beliefs like these:

“I’m smart enough to learn anything I set my mind to.”
“I can get started with the skills I have now, and I’ll learn any skills I need along the way.”
“I know how to find the right connections.”
“I’m good with money.”
“I’m making time to learn about these things.”

(Make sure you say these beliefs in the present tense, as if they’re true now.)

Once you realize that you actually have the ability to save yourself, you’re in a better position to embrace new beliefs like these. It may take time for them to take root, especially if that one belief about someone else coming to save you is really deep. But it’s only when you fully commit to uprooting that one belief that you can allow new and beneficial beliefs to take their place.

Final Thoughts

I think it can be hard for people who are hopeless romantics or avid fantasizers to release a mentality like this. (If you’re into personality typing, this is especially true for people of the INFJ and INFP personalities.)

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with fantasizing and dreaming, so long as that doesn’t keep you from making progress in your real life. But if you find that it is, you might want to reconsider indulging in those fantasies as much.

I know it’s not very romantic to save yourself, but I do believe there are ways to romanticize it. For example, instead of using your creative mind to fantasize about someone coming to rescue you, why not fantasize about all the things you’ll be able to do when you become wealthy or financially free?

That’s something that only becomes possible with a money mindset that encourages you to take control of your financial situation. And if you would like some tips on how to start developing one, you can check out this post.

Now I turn it to you. Do you think this one belief can keep people from improving their money mindset? Why or why not?

~ Ashley C.

Note: The advice presented here is for informational purposes only. If you’re in need of professional financial advice, please see a qualified professional.

Last updated: June 21, 2024